“Rule your mind, or it will rule you.” - Horace!

 

My name is Elena,

 

Allow me to introduce myself and give you some insight of my world…Ever since I was a little girl, I dreamt of becoming a professional model in Paris, do the catwalks, shoot covers of famous magazines and eat an ice-cream on big screen.

 

Fortunately for me, my dream came true and at the age of 16 I flew to Paris to be a model. A little girl full of dreams and hopes. But the little that I knew, my dreams were coming with a price to pay.

 

I started off great, I was living in the clouds right next to Champs-Élysées. But soon after I realised that this business wasn’t all that shiny and simple. To be a professional model, you had to be size 36 if not less. I was never fat but I wasn’t model skinny. So my agency called me in and said: “or you lose weight or we’re sending you back home. If you don’t have the will to do it, there are plenty of other girls who are up to the challenge.” Terrified of losing my dream, I started a strict diet: an apple a day, exactly what they say about models. At some point my agent called me again to say that clients weren’t happy cause I was too skinny now and looked ill. Obviously, I’m 180 and weighted 52kg. In order to look healthy but still model skinny, I started to workout and eat “normal”. I started to look healthier and fit but the agent called again!! “You have too much muscles”!! I didn’t know what to do anymore, I was going mad, wanted to give up everything but my ambitions were stronger than me. So, one day, a friend of mine suggested that I try yoga.. That it was great for the body and for the mind.. It was out of question for me cause I have always pictured yoga as something extremely boring and as a simple stretching . I needed something more physical.. blood, sweat and tears.. So I continue treadmill and jump rope like a mad person. And again, agency wasn’t happy about it and I started to lose jobs… but I didn’t care cause I was physically and mentally strong. I realised that I wanted out of this business but I just didn’t know what I would do for living, nothing was inspiring me.. Going back home wasn’t an option. So I had to stay and fight.

 

So, long story short, in 2001 I was on holidays with bunch of friends in Bali and there was a yoga class at 5am, one of my friends, dragged me there kicking and screaming and to this day I’m happy and grateful she did. It was magical.. The energy of the teacher was so huge, impossible to describe in words. The feeling I had was indescribable, I never felt so connected to my body and mind.I came back to Paris, started to look for studios to practice. I didn’t know anything about yoga, I just wanted to get that feeling back.. like a junkie. I’ve tried some teachers, but they weren’t it, I started to get disappointed but then found Bikram yoga. And its a tough one: 90 minutes in hot room 40° and 40% humidity. That will keep your mind steady and concentrated. I’ve practiced this style for about 2 years and then wanted to try something else, a different style, learn more postures. I needed a new challenge. That’s when I discovered Vinyasa Yoga.

 

The more I practiced yoga the more I was losing interest in modelling, I couldn’t stand the superficiality of it anymore. Don’t get me wrong there are tons of beautiful things about it, opportunities to travel the world, meet and work with many talented people but it wasn’t for me anymore. Not to sound cheesy but yoga woke something up inside of me.. And the more I practiced, the more I was searching for answers to the questions I didn’t even know.Time went by and I moved to Geneva… So again I had to look for the “right” teacher. Tried many studios, kinda found one, wasn’t crazy about it but it was something. Modelling in Geneva is a dead end. So, I started a part job in sales and I simply hated it. So, that’s when I’ve decided to chase another dream… To be a yoga teacher! I found a school, seem to be ok, started the training and 2 weeks into it, I developed a cervical herniated disk… At some point I couldn’t feel either of my arms, the pain was insane that I had to stop my training. My practice was over. I stopped everything… few years went by, I started to miss my practice, my pain was gone and I didn’t have any excuses anymore. So, I started slowly coming back to it. In 2018 I was fully recovered and searching again for a school to do my training. Through some recommendations signed up for a training of Vinyasa Yoga but then… Covid happened and again everything was put on hold. During this period, I continued practicing alone, at home with a YouTube video of Ashtanga Yoga primary series. And if Bikram was hard, this was whole other level of hard… The amount of dedication, concentration, will and breath awareness Ashtanga demands is crazy. Your body reacting differently every practice. One day you get it and then you lose it for months. You have to practice every single day to reach some results. And I think that’s what love about it: the control of your mind! The discipline. The more I practiced the more I wanted to know and understand, that’s when the spiritual curiosity came. After practice my mind was calm and clear and ready to learn more. I started to read books and they all made so much sense.. Its funny cause you can read the same book over and over again, and every single time you learn something new. Covid was actually the blessing in disguise, I felt ready for my training. Finally in 2021 the lockdown was lifted and I could finally start my training. But we still had a lot of restrictions: small groups, short amount of time and a mask on the face… so, the teaching was divided in two years: 2 weeks that year and 2 weeks the next.. But it was totally worth it. In 2022 I graduated 300 hours YTT in a beautiful place called Sixt-Fer-a-Cheval in France and that’s when it all began.

 

I started to teach almost right after my graduation. I was so stressed seeing all these people in front of me, waiting for the class to start. And I remember thinking to myself: its just like your first fashion show… all the bright lights, tons of eyes staring at you but if you want to do this job, you got to suck it in and just do it. And it went great… People were very understanding of my trembling voice, they gave me all of their support and encouragement. And they keep doing it by coming back to every class over 2 years now. And that’s the best “thank you” a teacher can get: seeing the same faces coming back and new faces joining.

 

So, I guess, I want to say thank you to all of my students cause without you I wouldn’t have done it. You are my biggest inspiration.

 

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